WTH

He is so fucking frustrating. First, yesterday, to tell me after he is at work for over 12 hours, while I am home working FT and my mom helping with the 3 little babies, that he will SACRIFICE his Tuesday night SA meeting so i can go to my SAnon meeting, like give me a fucking break. You are making this holier than thou sacrifice after over 15 years of Lies, deceits, and betrayal by not going to one meeting of the 9 meetings you regularly attend so that I can make the only 1 meeting that I go to. Fuck off. And then when i express discomfort with the word sacrifice (like he, the cheating lying sex addict is so magnanimous, really, he is going to do me this big solid so I can get a modicum of support that is only needed bc of your SA and complete and utter betrayal) you tell me it’s just a word and not to get caught up in it and you are in fact giving something up. If it’s just a word and didn’t have that meaning behind it, then when I express discomfort, you change your word. You don’t make it a whole thing. Then when I am done and want to have time for just me for the first time all day, you stand in front of me blocking my view of the TV to say what you want even though I have expressed that I am not open to listening at that moment. When I have to be painful about that you finally get it and walk away telling me how rude I am. Fuck you. You storm away. Great. Who is left to do all the before bed kitchen clean up, me. Lovely. But good thing you are making that major fucking sacrifice. Then tonight, you are snoring your f*ing face off. I ask you to put in your mask. Ok. Don’t do it. Snore. I wait. I ask again. Over and over. I DONT WANT TO ASK YOU TO PIT ON YOUR MASK! I am not your mom. You agreed to do things that improve your health. This is one of those things. Be an adult and put on the fucking mask. Then you get mad at me and storm out. You are going to sleep somewhere else. Fine. Part of me wants to follow you. Talk about it. Force the issue. But I am not f*ing doing that anymore. Be pissy. Be irresponsible. Don’t follow through on what you agree to. Don’t be a man. Those are your decisions. I am deciding to do something different. And oh by the way, convenient. So when the baby wakes up, who will be taking care of him…hmmm, I guess me. How nice for you. Snore your face off somewhere else. Do you have your phone? This definitely wouldn’t be triggering would it? It has only been disclosed by you that you would chat would random ppl on apps at night when I would be asleep in our bed. You would sneak out for sexual encounters with people. But sure, sorry I annoyed you so thoroughly by putting on your stupid sleep apnea machine that allows you to sleep soundly and get good rest. And now I have to still be up between the turmoil in our country and the national disgrace and you, my mind is swirling and I cannot sleep. Hopefully writing all this out is a purging of my mind so I can rest and have some tranquility.